Bullying
Ernesto's story

How do you react to bullying? Ernesto sees now that fighting back made things worse. He says it’s better to keep trying to be the person you want to be.

I'm the middle child of five. My family came over here from Puerto Rico, and my sister was born there, but the rest of us four boys were born here. I just graduated high school. My plans are to go into the Americorps program and from there go on to college. I enjoy playing baseball. I love to read, write poetry, songs, Rap, whatever.

The biggest challenge growing up was realizing that not all the kids have to think like me. In the 7th and 8th grade I'd hear the racial jokes. I just let them go by, but after a while, I started getting into fights, shouting matches with these kids. I'd be walking down the hall and I’d hear “That greasy spick, Ernesto.” Or, “What do you think about the fact that the school has Latinos in it,” and things like that.

I pretended it didn't happen. I pretended as though they're my friends, they're just joking with me. I realize now friends don’t do that. They don’t say things like that to you. A lot of guys like to think they're a brick wall with no feelings. But it hurts a lot. I dealt with it very wrong. I dealt with it by getting violent, and stooping down to that level.

One day one of the seniors in the school – I was an 8th grader – called me a greasy spick, and he thought it was funny. He started laughing as though I was supposed to laugh with him. You can imagine a little 8th grader pushing him. He was at the top of the steps, so he almost fell down all the steps. He had to grab onto one of the banisters.

I realized then that the fights didn't solve anything. I just basically put myself into a deeper hole that I had to dig out of.

People didn't know what was wrong with Ernesto. Why was he angry all the time? I really didn't know who I was. I was going through a lot of things. I was watching myself do things that I wouldn't normally do.

I went to a Leadership Camp. One of the staff advisors and I had a long talk. I told him everything. He told me one reason people put others people down is to feel better about themselves. This whole macho tough guy act. By my picking on others was making me the fool. I t was really good talk.

What I learned from all my experiences and everything that I've seen and gone through is that there's a brighter side.

As you go on in life, you'll see that you're never going to be that ideal person you want to be. But if you keep striving to be that person, you're going to be much better off. If you do what your heart says to do, and your mind says to do, you're going to be better off. And don't let other people be the reason that you do things.